Wednesday, September 11, 2013

11 year anniversary

Today is the 12 year anniversary of the September 11th attacks.  It is a date that will forever be etched in the mind of every American. Many lost their lives on that fateful day. 

Today is also the 11 year anniversary of my brother's death. Yes, it still feels like yesterday that he was taken away from us but time has a way of lessoning the pain. He is gone but his memory lives on. I only hope his death was not in vain.  It saddens me when I see family and friends continue to live that lifestyle. I am almost positive that if Lance was alive today he would not be in prison or a rehab or bound by drugs, alcohol, and gangs. He would be with his 2 sons living for God. All of you who think you knew Lance may laugh and think oh yeah right but you weren't there the last few weeks of his life. He spent a few nights at our house. We swam, hung out, had fun that didn't involve getting wasted and not remembering what happened the next morning. He came to church with us too. 

I've always looked up to my brother. I wasn't proud of the things drugs made him do and never had a desire to do them but he was my big brother and I thought the world of him. I hated his lifestyle. I hated seeing him almost die because of the drugs he'd taken. I hated when I couldn't see him because he was locked away.  But I loved him. I prayed every night for my brother. I wanted him to live for God and not to be bound by the lifestyle he was living. 

One night before he died he actually came to the altar to pray on his own. Nobody asked him to, he just went. I went pray with him and watched the tears streaming down his face.  A few days later he was dead. Sometimes I get so mad and think how unfair life is. Just when he was beginning to make a change in his life he got taken away. But I know God has a plan in everything even though I don't understand it. 

So if you are reading this and you were a "friend" or family of Lance, don't let his death be in vain.  He was trying to change. You can change too.  

Want to read my other posts about Lance?
http://www.theessenceofwhoiam.blogspot.com/2012/02/essay-i-wrote-in-highschool.html

http://www.theessenceofwhoiam.blogspot.com/2011/09/forgiveness.html

http://www.theessenceofwhoiam.blogspot.com/2011/08/whats-on-my-mind-today.html

http://www.theessenceofwhoiam.blogspot.com/2011/02/happy-birthday-lance.html

http://www.theessenceofwhoiam.blogspot.com/2010/09/wake-me-up-when-september-ends.html

http://www.theessenceofwhoiam.blogspot.com/2009/02/just-thought.html